Wednesday, July 11, 2007

It's the Sound of Silence ... or Sex.

"Hello darkness, my old friend. I've come to talk to you again," sings Simon and Garkunkel. So while watching the All-Star game last evening I fell asleep on the couch. No surprise since it was kind of a boring game, although Ichiro's inside the park homer was kinda cool. Too bad, due to him and Johnny Damon, the Twins don't have a shot at keeping Torii Hunter, unless he takes a very good hometown deal. So I wake up around 11:30 and head to bed.

I'm tossing and turning for about an hour. And I'm just on the cusp of falling asleep, when I start to hear a mattress noise. And it's not mine. That's right, the 19-year-old-Aveda-in-training upstairs neighbor is having sex. And her mattress is taking a beating.

I've been scarred with sex stories since high school. And I really think it's because I never want to know anyone's stories that this stuff happens to me. Luckily, upstairs girl and her friend weren't making any noises, only the mattress was. But still. All I could do was put my pillows and holler "LA-LA-LA-LA-LA" at the top of my lungs, hoping with my window open they would hear me and at least tone it down.

I don't know if it's their age, if alcohol was involved or if they heard me, but exactly three minutes of my "La-LA-La-ing" it, silence returned. And yes, the sounds of silence were my friends. And I went to sleep, eventually.

No comments: